I Flatlined Twice on the Way to the Hospital...
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Hello, Personal things about myself has never been easy dealing with or talking about! Being real & transparent is one of the toughest things I've ever had to do! Sometimes situations in your life aren't easy to understand and even harder to try and communicate what your feeling. All I know is that I was given another chance at life, that I was not worthy of! I don't deserve to be able to tell my story, a real miracle, because without God Almighty, I would not be here right now to be able to tell it! Someone seen my sign on the highway the other day and called me at work with a really peculiar/unusual question. They did not know me but got my phone # off of the billboard that's on the highway. This person was really, really, really needing someone to talk to and because of that image and text on the billboard, hoped that they could get an answer from a hard to ask question they had. If you'd like to read about it, it's about halfway down the page under the topic, 'The Lord's really been talking to me about this lately.'
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I was 19, a few days after getting home from college my freshman year. I was at my cousins house messing around and a friend happen to be out in the yard riding his 4 wheeler. Well, I always like to ride motor cycles pulling wheelies and things but had never ridden a 4wheeler, so I ask him if I could ride the ATV, he said sure. After getting on it riding around in my cousins yard I wanted to try and pull a wheelie. I seen a little mound in the yard so I thought I would hit it, pull back on the handle bar and see what kinda wheelie I could pull. Well, if I only would have new that would have been my last day/minute/second here on earth for all of eternity! When I pulled back on the handle, I didn't pull back hard enough and it landed on the front 2 wheels and it already had a forward momentum therefore kept going forward upside down landing right on top of me. It weighed around 5 or 600lbs landing right on top of me and I wasn't wearing a helmet. After it landed on me, it bounced 1 more time and landed back on its wheels, that's how much momentum it had going forwarded using me as the trampoline.
My cousin saw it happen and ran down to the spot in his yard I was at. I was lying on my back not moving. He looked into my eyes and they had rolled back, all he could see was the white of my eyes and he knew it wasn't good. He ran up to the house to get his parents and just so happened(Lords plan) there was the dad of my friend there that had been in the military and knew about this kind of stuff and he ran down and kept me from swallowing my tongue. I started spitting up blood so they knew the 4 wheeler had crushed things inside of me, not to mention my head, that had been landed on. Luckily the doctor at the bottom of their driveway just happened to be home also (Lords plan again) and he came right up and kept me alive until the ambulance got there. I more or less died twice going to the hospital well, my heart stopped beating and they had to put those electrical blaster things on my chest and shocked me to get my heart to start beating again, which without the shocker things I was a goner.
After arriving at the hospital emergency room, they got me out of the ambulance and inside and did tests on me to see what was happening. At the hospital, my family was informed that there was only a slim possibility that I would even live and if I did live I was for sure to be brain dead due to my extensive brain injury. They've gone through these kinds of accidents before so they knew the usual outcome of the patients and were just trying to be real with my parents. I was in a coma for 11 days, they had me on life support systems giving me oxygen, food, etc.....tubes all in my arms. They weren't for sure if I’d ever even come out of the coma. My body got down to about 115lbs and I was 5'10" there was nothing left of me, just skin and bones.
What I thank the Lord so much for now is that I had so many people praying for me, including the Gideon prayer chain my dad started, which reached out to people all over the US & possibly the world. I thank God for this because I know that these prayers were heard and with the Lords mercy saved my life. God not only listened but He mercifully answered those prayers! I am living proof that He exists. I should have died that day going to the hospital, well I did die twice but God had other plans for me, thank the Lord! I did not know Him before that accident. I was a good guy, had good parents who loved me so much and brought me up in the Lord. They taught me right from wrong which I am so thankful for having Godly parents!!! But, I did not know Him as my personal Lord & Savior and was on my way to hell forever if the Lord would not have given me another chance!!!
I knew of Him very well. I knew all the bible stories and learned the books of the bible. I went to church every Sunday and Wednesday but still did not know Him as my personal Lord and Savior! He convicted me time and time again but I always kept putting Him off thinking I had time but at that moment my time was over and all that was left would have been Judgment Day! If I had died, the only other words I would have ever heard would have been, "Depart from me into ever lasting fire, Forever!" When I think about that, I cannot describe the feelings because I did not know Him and I would have been doomed to Hell for Eternity and I would have not been able to argue with God because I had not accepted Him. I had so many opportunities, I just thought I had plenty of time.
I was only 19, healthy as could be, I didn't think I had to worry about that yet. Now I see the devils #1 line, 'You've got Plenty of Time' trying his best to take who ever he can to hell with him! He was trying his best to keep me from Heaven and to keep me from finding out how AWESOME it is to have Jesus as my Father, my Savior, forgiving me for all my sins. Not only my past sins but the sins in the FUTURE, He can already see (He can see the future perfectly, He created time). He knows exactly what's out there but He still loves me and is still willing to give me Eternal life and a home in Heaven. He even knows exactly where & when I will fail / sin every time from now until I go and be with Him in Heaven someday and He still loves me, unthinkable to understand how He could do that! His love for us is more than words can describe! Thank you Father!
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1 Incident that Happened while in the Emergency Room
One I'll never forget! After coming out of my coma, still in the emergency room, still with tubes in my arms and chest, partially paralyzed, right side because it was a left front lobel brain injury which affects the opposite side. Well, I knew my friends were on there way to see me so I came up with this big idea. To sit up in my bed with my legs hanging over the side. I thought that would look so cool, trying to act like everything was OK & all. I could not even lift my left arm much above my waste because I lost all my muscle and had NO strength left. My right arm was almost totally out of commission (coma 11days) but I was going to do it even if it killed me because my friends were coming in to visit me and I wanted them to think I was all ok! I started to put my legs over the side of this huge bed that was like 10ft. off the ground or at least it looked that high at that point. I was so weak and they didn't have the guard rails up yet because they didn't know the kind of person I was, ha. Before I knew it, I got off balance and the next thing I remember, I hit the floor hard because I had no way of catching myself, no muscle. After the pain of the fall subsided, I tried and tried and tried to climb back up into that bed and could not do it for nothing, too weak. So after a few minutes of struggling I wore myself out and just passed out right there on the hard cold tile floor.
As you may know, when you’re in the emergency room all they give you is a little thin gown that is open in the back. When I fell it came off and after the struggle while passing out, I was lying there on the floor with absolutely nothing on. Mom just left for a little bit to run to McDonald's to get a sandwich for me cause I had not eaten in like 2 weeks. The thing that happened was when she got back and walked through that door, seen me lying on the floor totally passed out but looking just like I had fallen out of bed. No telling what she thought because I would never in a million years just fall asleep on the hard cold tile floor by accident especially without a stitch of clothing on in the middle of the hospital with the room door open!
I forgot to tell you, she didn't want to leave me cause I had just come out of the coma and was kinda not all there, if you know what I mean. She made sure and told all the nurses, "Make SURE you keep a watch on him cause she knew how I was." As you can imagine the surprise when she walked through that door after rushing back and seen me lying on the floor looking like a dead person with nothing on. No telling what she thought but the bad thing for me was when they all heard this piercing scream she echoed down the corridors of the hospital. They all came rushing in to pick me up off the floor and to make sure I wasn't hurt. Well, I was sound asleep and next thing I knew all these nurses were frantically grabbing me trying to lift me up off the floor into the bed. But me, I was fighting for my life. All I knew was I was down to the bare essentials and all these women were grabbing me while I was trying to cover myself. Using my one almost paralyzed hand for cover but at the same time fighting for my life with my other arm that only worked about half way. Not an easy task under my conditions especially with 6 crazy nurses attacking me, not knowing their true intentions were good.
Finally after all the commotion they got me in bed. I was totally embarrassed to say the least, while the nurses were walking out giggling! Gotta go but I'll finish this story later of how the Lord totally took control and the doctors were totally amazed of my progress in such a short time. Its fun to look back on now but when I was 19, kinda insecure, it wasn't one of my better days, eh! :o)
I forgot to tell you about why I asked for you to please overlook my grammatical errors in this story. Well, I had a front lobal left side brain injury. I was told by a friend doctor of mine that the side/spot of the brain that was hit affects a persons English/grammar and memory. So they new that I might not have much of that left if any, even if I came out of my coma. After I woke up, I lost all my memory. I still knew who people were but couldn't remember any names of anything. Like the seasons, winter, spring, summer & fall or Christmas or months of the year, days of the week, more or less, I lost about all of my memory and had to remember everything over again! And my forgetfullness, oh, couldn't remember things that just happened after 5 or 10 minutes, so frustrating! I was in a wheel chair at first because I was totally paralyzed on my right side and I had about 1/2 moment on my left side and the doctors didn't even know if I'd ever be able to walk again, most accidents like mine, they don't! But you would have never guessed by me pulling wheelies in my wheel chair going down the hallways. ha
I've had some really close friends pass away so quickly in the last year, no one knows their last day here on earth! You can have a home in Heaven Today! Don't give the devil another minute of your life! You are on this page right now, reading this right now for a reason, think about it! The Lord has so put this on my heart lately because you never know if this might be the last time you will ever get to see someone again after you get done talking to them! Tomorrow is never a guarantee for anyone.
I will finish this story someday but If i never get to meet you here, I so hope to meet you in Heaven!!!!
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People have heard of the term born again but to many it is not understood. “You must be born again." What exactly does those words mean. Well, I will try and give you my understanding of them. Both believers and unbelievers still use Jesus' words "born again," and many, like Nicodemus, are still confused by them.
Correcting Nicodemus's misunderstanding, Jesus told him that people must be reborn spiritually to see or enter the Kingdom of God. “Jesus answered and said to him, ‘Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.' Nicodemus said to Him, can he enter a second time into his mother’s womb and be born? Well, he knew that wasn't the right answer but he was just wanting Jesus to explain to him exactly what that meant. Well, I believe, the phrase figuratively means "born from above", becoming CHILDREN of God through our believing and trust in our Lord Jesus Christ. Without the Holy Spirit in one's life they are spiritually dead but when they receive the Holy Spirit into their lives through their faith in Jesus they become Born Again, like a rebirth. Only those who are Born Again can have their sins forgiven and have a relationship with God Almighty. But the good thing is, Every single one of us can be Born Again and have that relationship with Jesus Christ our Lord. This is why I am putting my testimony on here because I KNOW Jesus is real and I don't want you to miss Heaven and all the amazing things He already has planned for you all the rest of your days on this earth. There is no way in a million years I would be here right now typing this if it wasn't for my Saviours love and power, giving me another chance that I did not deserve. Your reading this right now only because of His mercy and grace.
We have ALL sinned and I know for me it seems like I don't deserve to have a relationship with Jesus who is HOLY without sin, PERFECT in every way. I know this fleshly body of mine is so far from perfect and holy but I just want to encourage you, we all have a fleshly body that wants so much things that is against the will of Jesus. I want to encourage you, after we take that step of faith and accept Him into our hearts, God almighty becomes our FATHER! He gives us the Holy Spirit and with Him in control, He will ALWAYS make a way for us to escape those temptations, if we are willing and choose to take that path.
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Tears represent the heart, the spirit and the soul of a person. To put a lock and key on your emotions is to bury part of your Christ likeness! Especially when you come to Calvary! You can't go to the Cross with just your head and not your heart. It doesn't work that way. Calvary is not a mental trip. It's not an intellectual exercise. It's not a divine calculation or a cold theological principle. It's a Heart-Splitting hour of Emotion! Don't walk away from it dry-eyed and unstirred. Don't just straighten your tie and clear your throat. Don't allow yourself to descend Calvary cool and collected. Please . . . . Pause. Look again! That's Jesus our Savior on that cross! Those are nails in His hands and feet. That's God Almighty's only begotten Son hanging on that old rugged cross. It's us who put Him there! Think about that, we hung Him there to die the most torturous, shameful, degrading death with the most excruciating pain possible! Our Father did that for us! |
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Struggles - Thorns in the Flesh - Temptations
Even After We Accept HIM as our FATHER - WHY?
While in my room at the hospital I was so confused, not understanding why I was still struggling with the same struggle that I had always had to deal with. I always thought that after I accepted the Lord's calling and He became my Father and I was born again, that this struggle in my life that so easily captivates or entices me would be removed and I wouldn't have to struggle or deal with this any more. Well for me that didn't happen and I was SO discouraged while still in the hospital getting better after I came out of my coma and accepted the Lord as my personal Savior! I didn't have anyone to talk to about it at that time. It was such a personal issue and I had never talked to anyone about it before! The devil tried to use that against me trying to tell me that I wasn't a child of my Father Lord God Almighty. That He wouldn't accept such a filthy/wretched person like me and that I wouldn't be going to Heaven. He kept trying to tell me that lie! Well, since that struggle was still there in my life, it was causing me to doubt if I truly was saved, if He truly would accept me into His kingdom someday with my struggle still being there just as strong as before.
Well, I just want to encourage you, if you have asked Him wholeheartedly to forgive you of your sins and be your Father, your King of Kings and Lord of Lords that just because He doesn't remove that struggle or thorn in your flesh, DOES NOT MEAN HE HAS NOT ACCEPTED YOU!!! The reason I can say this is because Paul, possibly one of the strongest God fearing apostles in the new testament had a thorn in his flesh also. He could not stand that thorn, he hated that thorn with a passion and desperately cried to the Lord 3 different times in prayers earnestly asking with all his might for the Lord to remove that thorn in his flesh. After the 3rd prayer the Lord said, "Paul, my grace is sufficient for that struggle, thorn, weakness in your life." The Lord left that defiling thorn in his life but after the Lord told him that, he was finally able to BOOST about his thorn (if you could imagine him boosting about something that caused him so much affliction & anguish). He knew that through that thorn the Lord had left in his life he was able to get so much closer to the Lord. He knew he had to make the Lord #1 in his life everyday. Surrender all his doubts, weaknesses and uncertainties AND THAT THORN everyday to the Lord in order to defeat that thorn in his life.
After I understood about Paul's thorn/weakness and how he used it to become stronger and closer to the Lord, I was finally able to understand/deal with that thorn/weakness the Lord had left in my life. The devil could not try and make me doubt any longer!!! Those chains that had been wrapped around me my entire life were finally gone, he had no control any longer. Not to say I am not still tempted everyday with that thorn but that those chains are gone, Praise the Lord!!!
So I just want to try and encourage you, if you still struggle with a thorn or weakness in your life and those chains are still wrapped around you, use that thorn or weakness against the devil and become closer to the Lord. Just like Paul, don't let it get you down but turn your life completely over to the Lord daily giving Him everything and He will RIP those chains out of the devils grip taking pounds upon pounds of weight off your shoulders you've been carrying all your life. This will make your journey through life so much easier and fulfilling and He will be there every step of the way!
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It’s been several weeks since it happened and I didn’t know how to share the story He put before me. I knew He let it happen for a reason but was so unsure how to talk about what had happened. Well, last night I told Him I would at least try and write something so I started looking for something to write on before I sat down on the floor at the place where I always read the bible and pray. I was looking for a book or something to put my paper on to write on and first thing I seen was a little door. I mean there were other doors all around and other little pads/booklets I could had used but I just so happened to want to open this door, so I opened it and there was a book behind some stuff just the right size for the paper I had. I picked it up and it said, “The Inspirational Writings of Chuck Swindall”. I had never seen that book before, not sure how it got there, but it was a big thick book perfect for what I was looking to write on. Then I thought, well maybe the Lord wanted to show me something in this book before I started writing because I knew Chuck Swindall was a God fearing Christian so I opened it and, WOW, unbelievable what the first couple pages had to say. Exactly where I was at, with this story! The way the Lord works is SO AMAZING!
Chuck was trying to get us to understand that the son of man didn’t come to be served but to serve and give His life as a ransom for many – Mark 10:45 He talked about, to be a true servant God has called us to be, we need to be Authentic, Real and Transparent in all we do. Those 3 words have always SO convicted me because I want to be what those words convey but fall short so often. I’m not sure about others, but for me, there are times I put on a mask and I am not always Authentic or Transparent or Real. I kept reading and this one line that I read really spoke to me and I hope it speaks to you: “A true servant stays in touch with the struggles others experience” so they are able to encourage and help when they see others struggling in this journey through life.
Well, this is what the Lord has so been putting on my heart for the last couple of weeks after I received this phone call at work. It really hurt because I knew this person was in such despair but didn’t have anyone to talk to. The question this person (I’ll say he to make it easier) asked was, “will all gay people go to hell, because all the Christians I know thinks they will?” Well, I hesitated to answer, not knowing who this was or why he called me. I asked him if I knew him and he said no, he was from a state out west and I asked him how he got my number and he said, I was going down the highway the other day and seen your bill board and wrote down the phone number. I said, why did you call me? He said after seeing your billboard I figured you were a Christian and I wanted to know what you thought. I kinda hesitated again, asking the Lord to give me the words to say. I forget the exact words I used but I told him I loved the Lord very much and wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for His compassion and His powerful touch of healing to give me another chance to live, when I was 19(in a coma for 11days after a ATV 4wheeler accident).
I tried to explain, some people are attracted to the opposite sex, some people are attracted to the same sex, some people are attracted to both sexes and some are not attracted to either. While growing up these different drives that I mentioned above are usually formed around the ages of 9 - 12(from environment's that we are in, situations that we go through etc...) and most of us, at this age, weren’t even aware that this was happening. After the drive develops, this is an involuntary or spontaneous reaction that our bodies automatically produce when something sparks or triggers our hormones. The Question is: is it good, right, healthy or holy to act on everything that arouses us? Well, I believe in God’s eyes for some things the answer is yes and for other things the answer is no. I just want to encourage you and let you know, God knew back a thousand years ago, exactly where you would be right now, today. Exactly how many hairs are on your head down to the last 1 and exactly how many nerve cells your body has down to the last one trillionth and if He knows that, I am VERY sure He also knew right where you would be at with your sex drive, right now. God promises us this and is faithful, ‘He will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you can handle but will with that temptation provide a way out so that you are able to endure it'. 1 Corinthians 10:13 I’m saying this because He wants to be your Father So, So much and He will love you and take care of you and so much help you on this journey through life that we all have to go through. Someday He wants to give you a home in Heaven forever where you will never have to deal with any of these things again!
I didn’t quote the verse perfectly but said that Jesus is not willing that anyone should perish but that ALL make it to Heaven. 2 Peter 3:9 The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.(and be given a home in Heaven) That verse right there tells us that Jesus wants ALL OF US to make it to Heaven, no matter what our sex drive is or what we are dealing with in life. He wants every single one of us to believe in Him and ask Him to be our Father and to ask Him to forgive us of our sins and by doing that you are promised by God Almighty to have a home in Heaven! He wants you to come to Him just as you are like the lyrics say:
Just as I am, without one plea, But that Thy blood was shed for me, And that Thou bidst me come to Thee, O Lamb of God, I come, I come. |
Just as I am, though tossed about With many a conflict, many a doubt, Fightings and fears within, without, O Lamb of God, I come, I come. |
Just as I am, and waiting not To rid my soul of one dark blot, Thee whose blood can cleanse each spot O Lamb of God, I come, I come. |
Just as I am, Thou wilt receive, Wilt welcome pardon cleanse relieve Because Thy promise I believe, O Lamb of God, I come, I come. |
He wants you just as you are, I told him, you don’t have to change 1 thing when coming to Him. He wants to so much be your Father and take care of you and love you with more love then you could ever imagine. He’s standing at your door and knocking but you have to let Him in. He sent His only begotten son to die on that old rugged cross for our sins, the most horrible shameful death possible, to try and show us how much He truly loves us. His son’s death was a ransom for OUR SINS but now we can have God Almighties Holy Spirit living in us and He will lead us and guide us in our path through this journey in life, never ever leaving our side, that’s His promise!
If you take that step of faith and ask Him to be your Father and to forgive you of your sins and believe with your whole heart, you will have that relationship with Jesus Christ and He will be your Father and He will love you and guide you and convict you when you do something wrong. You will know if you are doing something against His will, He will definitely tell you by loving and convicting and disciplining you just like my parents did as I was growing up because they loved me and wanted me to have the best life possible! He will give you a home in Heaven and be your Father and take care of you, that is what He promises us and I believe that with all my heart!!! I told him, I hope this helps you to understand, it doesn’t matter what we are dealing with here on earth because each one of us has STRUGGLES, WEAKNESSES, THORNS IN THE FLESH, SINS, SEXUAL TEMPATATIONS etc... THAT WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH, FOR A LOT OF US EVERYDAY. HIS PROMISE IS, HE WILL BE YOUR FATHER NO MATTER WHAT YOU ARE DEALING WITH AND WILL GIVE YOU A HOME IN HEAVEN FOREVER AND LOVE YOU WITH A LOVE THAT IS LITERALLY OUT OF THIS WORLD, IF YOU CHOOSE HIM!
He said thanks for talking with me, then he hung up. The Lord told me right after he hung up that He wanted me to put this with my testimony. I said, Lord, you know I cannot do that, no way, that is way too much to ask, I JUST CAN'T DO IT, then I put it out of my mind. Well, take it from me, thats something you don't tell the Lord, I CAN'T because yesterday He did something, I can’t even begin to explain, totally blew my mind and really, really put the fear in me! He was telling me He let this phone call happen for a reason and that I was going to talk about it! I knew I had to at least try and write something. Fear is the beginning of Wisdom(Prov. 9:10) and I fear my Father very much and I also love Him and try my best to do what He wants me to, which isn’t easy sometimes. Think about this, there is 100 billion stars in our 1 galaxy, the Milky Way(which is 100,000 light years in diameter) This is where it gets interesting, there are 100 – 200 billions galaxy’s all with + or - 100 billion stars in each galaxy that He created in 1 day, go figure, that’s totally uncomprehendible for me, His POWER. But this is even more bizarre, someone with that kind of omniscient power, knowledge and wisdom, God Almighty, wants more than anything to be our loving Father and take care of us and protect us and love us everyday for the rest of our lives here on earth and after, give us a home in Heaven, more then our minds can possibly fathom!!!
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The other day I was reading this poem, My Friend, and it really convicted me. I don't want any of my friends to stand before Him on Judgment Day and this be their story. Any one who is reading this today I consider a possible friend. If you chose Heaven to be your home forever, we will all be true friends there and I will have Forever to get to know each of you. I just hope if you're reading this right now, this will not be your story as you stand before Him on judgment day! If this would had been your dreadful end as you read this right now, you can accept Him as your Lord and Savior Today turning this story into a Victorious, Triumphant Beginning! But that decision is yours and it will last Forever! I really care about all my friends and whoever is reading this today, you're my friend also and someday I hope to meet you in Heaven and become best of friends!
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My friend I stand in judgment now,
And feel that you're to blame somehow,
On earth I walked with you by day,
And never did you point the way.
You knew the Lord in truth and glory,
But never did you tell the story,
My knowledge then was very dim,
You could have led me safe to Him.
Though we lived together on earth,
You never told me of the second birth,
And now I stand this day condemned
Because you failed to mention Him.
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You taught me many things, that's true,
I called you "friend", and trusted you,
But I learn now that it's too late,
You could have kept me from this fate.
We walked by day, and talked by night,
And yet you showed me not the light,
You let me live, and love, and die,
You knew I'd never live on high.
Yes, I called you "friend" in life,
And trusted you through joy and strife,
And yet on coming to this dreadful end
I cannot, now, call you, "my friend."
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My paster had a really interesting line in his sermon last Sunday:
'Until you are able to see yourself as a sinner you won't be able to see THE NEED for a Savior'
If you want to truly know and Love Him this prayer will change your life! Just humbly talk to HIM! "Lord Jesus Christ, I am sorry for my sins and I ask for your forgiveness for the sins I have done in my life. Please come into my life and be my Father and let me be your child and let your blood wash me and cleanse me from all my unrighteousness! Thank you for dying on that old rugged cross for my sins. Please Love me and come into my heart and fill me with your Holy Spirit and let me worship you and praise you forever & ever! Thank you Father, Lord Jesus Christ, Amen!!!"
Its that PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH OUR FATHER, NOT religion or a system of beliefs!!!
"I am the Lord, the God of all flesh; is there anything to hard for me?"
I Love this Verse!!! Jeremiah 32:27
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'Why'
'Why'
'Why'
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Every human being ever born has had one need in common. This one need is the most basic need of life, and ultimately it is infinity above every other need. It is the need to be forgiven of our sins and to come into a relationship with God Almighty so that we may have an abundant life now and in Eternity hereafter. One great truth is this, that every other need in life is secondary to this need, to be born again spiritually. I believe that once this need is met in a person's life, Jesus will make a way for you to meet all your other needs. But, until this need is met, many of your other needs cannot be met.
God does truly love you and He is Returning and His Returning is called the Rapture! If you don't know Him or don't understand how He speaks to you, it's that small simple voice He uses. No astronomical meltdowns or earthquakes or erupting volcanoes that He could use, just that small simple voice, that's how He chooses to call us. Think about it, if He called us by forcing us to accept what His son has already did for us on that cross then His son's crucifixion on the cross would have been totally meaningless, insignificant, pointless! The whole reason behind the question of 'WHY' His son's death on that cross, was for Him to try His best to show us how much He truly does love us and cares for us. His blood was shed for OUR sins and He wanted to give us His Holy Spirit to lead us and guide us in this journey thru life! That's why He only uses a small simple voice, in respect of what His son has already did, to love us and convict us and show us how much He wants to give us a home in Heaven.
But, it is still totally our choice/decision, He's never going to force us or make us! If you truly know Him already I want to encourage you to stay strong, stick in there, its not always going to be easy but definitely worth the fight - A home in Heaven with our Savior, no more pain, death, fear etc..... so much more then our minds can possibly fathom!
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A word that I may never be able to grasp the depth of but for some reason lately, the Lord has really been trying to show me how much deeper of a meaning this word really has! He has helped me to understand to some degree how boundless and perplexing in magnitude those letters have when they're all put together. For us, its a genuine, sincere regret that creates sorrow and moves us to admit wrong and desire to do/be better. After Jesus was nailed hands and feet to that old rugged cross and left hanging there totally unclothed on that cross to die, the definition of repentance acquired a whole new meaning. So much more profound and consuming then our minds can possibly imagine. Every last drop of His blood was counted by His Father being Charred and Seared into that word "REPENTANCE"!
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Jesus is asking you this question:
"You wonder how long my love will last? You'll find your answer on a splintered cross on Galgotha's Hill. That's me you see up there, your maker/creator, your God, nail-stabbed hands and feet to that splintered cross hanging by those nails and bleeding. Covered in spit and vinegar and Sin-Soaked with every sin ever committed. That's your sin I'm feeling. That's your death I'm dying. That's your resurrection I'm living. If you could only realize, that's how much I Truly love you and want to give you a home in HEAVEN FOREVER! However, I give you the freedom to make your own choice!"
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This is what He has been putting on my heart this week, to emphasize. Just because you are a good person, live a good life, help others out, which is all good and what we want to try and do, THAT will not get you to Heaven. So many believe that and I have such a burden on my heart for them, I want to so badly try and show them what the Word of God says. Then, sometimes I understand them saying that they don't think they are good enough to have Jesus as their Father. This is what I want you to hear. NONE of us is good enough to have God Almighty to be our Father and there is nothing we can do to make us good enough. "Just as I am", is the way He wants us, JUST AS WE ARE, WE DON'T HAVE TO CHANGE 1 THING TO BE ABLE TO ASK HIM TO BE OUR FATHER! And after He becomes your Father, He will love you and talk to you and let you know if there is anything that needs to be worked on or changed, because He loves you more than you will ever understand and wants you to have the best life you can have!
And 1 last thing, even though we try our best, which is what He wants us to do, we will never be perfect after we accept Him as our Father because that is an impossibility that no one will ever achieve, ONLY JESUS! There was only 1 who has ever been perfect, His name is Jesus. If/when we do fail or sin, He will forgive us if we ask Him, as the song says, He will forgive us as many times as there is drops in the Ocean!
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I just want to thank you for reading this and someday I hope I get to meet you, if not here, definitely in Heaven! If you are a child of God, one thing I have come to understand. We Can Have the Assurance of Victory! In this victory is what conquers the world - OUR FAITH! Someday we will stand before the Face of God and see the King of Kings and Lord of Lords! In that world there will be no more sorrow, no more pain, no more tears. If you believe in the future and are assured of that victory then I believe He will put a dance in your step and a smile on your face. He loves you and wants to be your Father more than you will ever understand. Give Him a chance, He won't let you down!
I want to thank my Father for saving me, touching me, miraculously, giving me another chance that I was not worthy of! Thank you Father for letting me share my testimony and for a Miracle, a Real Miracle that you blessed me with, in Jesus name, Amen!
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A Testimony - A Real True Life Miracle - God's Amazing Love
Thank you for reading this and someday I hope I get to meet you, if not here, Deffinately in Heaven! Thank You Father for giving me the Opportunity & Courage to write this! In Jesus name, Amen!
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A Hebrew Word the Lord showed me at a Christian Conf recently
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The word in the Hebrew language is Guwl(gool). The Hebrew origin of the word REJOICE is Guwl meaning to spin around wildly or dance violently with joy. Well, I heard a good example. Think about the image of a child spinning around on a sunny day(or even a rainy day) with arms stretched out, eyes closed and face pointing upwards to the heavens with a wide grin possessing joy and welcoming gladness. I believe that is how God wants us to be! Whether it's a nice sunny day or the rain is coming down ferociously, our circumstance should not dictate our ability to Rejoice. "Rejoice in the Lord always and again I say Rejoice"! Philippians 4:4
This tells us that rejoicing should not be based on emotion but made by a conscious choice, conviction and attitude. Emotions are like the tide, sometimes up and sometimes down and therefore unstable and unreliable. God does not want us to base our ability to rejoice on how we feel on any given day or moment. He wants us to rejoice always even when we don't feel like it, which isn't easy sometimes
Not only does the Lord like to hear us rejoicing but it's also a weapon to disarm and defeat the devil. The devil does not want your job or your money or your health. What he wants is your Faith! The enemy knows that if he can get you to give up your Faith, then he has won the fight.
Joy and Peace are guardians to your Faith. If you make a constant choice to maintain an attitude of rejoicing(guwl) and maintain the peace of God, then your Faith is protected. Your rejoicing wreaks havoc on the enemy with your joy and peace because they are a couple of your most powerful weapons to defeat the enemy!
Zephaniah 3:17. "The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will REJOICE over you with singing." God expresses His extreme joy over us, because through every situation, He has already won the battle and is victorious!
"Let them praise His name with dance." (Psalms 149:3) Dance is the human body's most radical expression of joy and triumph and I believe this is how God wants us to REJOICE or GUWL!!!
Thank you Father for revealing this Hebrew Word to me and for those reading this, continue to fight the good fight of remaining Steadfast / Unwavering and Joyful; for God, who is your Joy, has given you the Victory! In Jesus name, Amen!
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But God gave me a second chance that I will never be able to thank Him enough for
Thank You Father!!!
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